QZ Writes |
Where I (queenofzan.tumblr.com) put my writing and things relating to it. |
What if
Edwards, Sharp, and Kev as paranormal investigators
….I can’t actually think of a way for this story to happen that wouldn’t be ripping off Mike Dies at the End’s premise WHOOPS whatever i love the idea of Sharp having to deal with an ever-growing number of people with psychic awareness being utterly incompetent because Kev can’t keep it in his pants
Also being annoyed that Kev and Edwards are so irresponsible when she is NOT WITH HER ROOMMATE just because it would be terrible even if she REALLY WANTS TO BE
though now my brain has gone off on a tangent about Max suddenly having psychic awareness and just SHUTTING DOWN his meds were not designed to cope with this he is FREAKING OUT and he CAN’T TELL ANYONE because they would just think they had initially misdiagnosed him or something
Just. Max seeing a ghost and just. No. Nope. This is not okay. No. No. And Edwards being like No it’s okay calm down they’re real and Max just lemongrabbing it up and being like NOT OKAY NO UNACCEPTABLE
Though I bet Mina believes Sharp immediately. Like Sharp is like okay so we can’t have sex bc of sexually transmitted ghostly powers and Mina would be like. That sucks. How sexually transmitted are we talking.
And Sharp’s just like “Okay but ghosts did you hear the part where I am a paranormal investigator, not just a regular private detective” and Mina’s like “yeah but I believe you bc you wouldn’t lie to me” and Sharp is like. I.
Why do I indulge these ridiculous ideas instead of working on any of the actually-plotted out stories I have in progress? WHO KNOWS.
Seriously though I don’t write anything unless it’s author appeal sorryyyyyy (not sorry)
A bodyswap story, in media res. Sketchy comicky bits of the beginning are 1, 2, 3, and 4.
cw for anxiety and panic attacks and that.
——
The phone rang. The display said Edwards, so Max prepared himself for the his own voice. It was even weirder over the phone. “What?” he said as he answered.
“I think I’m having a panic attack,” Edwards said, in Max’s voice, clearly trying not to cry. Max wasn’t sure why he bothered; it’s not like Max didn’t know what his own voice sounded like when it was trying not to cry. Then again, if Edwards was having a panic attack, he probably wasn’t overly rational. Max never was.
“I guess some of us adjust better to new bodies,” Max said.
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An out of context text conversation between Edwards and Max, regular ol’ No-longer-called-Silver-Chain ‘verse. Well, I mean, close enough.
——
—Are you kidding me? Empire is a masterpiece.—
—jedi is the triumphant conclusion! the heroes spend more of empire separated. what’s the point?—
—Only the whole story! Without conflict, a story is boring. Empire is ALL CONFLICT.—
—without resolution, a story is pointless.
—plus jedi has ewoks.—
—Oh my god you LIKE the Ewoks?—
—what’s not to like? they’re adorable killing machines.—
—This argument is over, because you are OBJECTIVELY WRONG.—
Later
—i hope you at least agree the prequels are shit.—
—Doesn’t everyone? It doesn’t get any worse than Attack of the Clones.—
—except for revenge of the sith.—
—Please, at least Sith doesn’t have the awful “romantic” dialog.—
—one word: NOOOOOOOOOO!—
—It still had more of a story than Clones. Clones was basically a placeholder.—
—i thought you liked the ‘conflict’ of the midpoint.—
—What conflict? You could take out practically all of the movie without changing the trilogy’s story.—
—yeah, and then anakin’s turn into vader would have even less context. clones tries to round things out. sith relies on cheap drama.—
—”I hate sand.” Tell me that isn’t cheap drama.—
—i’m not saying it’s good, just better than sith.—
Wow hi hello: there is a massive anxiety/panic attack trigger warning on this. I don’t know if I can stress this enough. This story is written from the perspective of someone having a panic attack, by someone trying to not have a panic attack but who is used to frequent panic attacks. It has a good chance of being triggering.
Anyway, I have known for a while now that Max has some sort of anxiety or panic disorder. And it turns out so do I, so he basically has very similar experiences to me nowadays. Which makes it easier to write, and also makes some of the earlier stuff I wrote kind of cringeworthy because I had no idea what I was talking about. Whoops.
——
There is a trick to having panic attacks, Max thinks. There is a trick to having panic attacks, he thinks again. He thinks this to himself every time he has a panic attack. There is a trick to having panic attack, and if he could only figure out what it was, he would be much happier. As it is, the trick seems to be “have them”. There is a trick to having panic attacks, and the trick is panic attacks.
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Mainly writing about this for Shannon, ngl.
I’m working on a thing right now about the aftermath of the stuff I’ve written in U4 for Sollo’s gang so far. It sure is a thing. Something (I haven’t decided what yet) went Horribly Wrong, and Edwards left Max to die, which is what gave them (Edwards, Kev, Early, and Jack) time to get the hell out of dodge. (Some other folks like Hazel may or may not have gotten out, but they didn’t end up with the group full of my POV characters, so…)
Anyway, at some point on the mad dash Away, Kev is injured and gets amnesia. This would be after Jack leaves the group.
Edwards is less than happy about how everyone he loves dies, and gets MAYBE A LITTLE mad about Kev not remembering a thing about him. Maybe. A little.
There is some other stuff going on but THAT IS ALL FOR NOW.
I have an AU-ing problem
Max, as usual when monster-fied, is a vampire. Kev is, shockingly, an incubus. And (not pictured here) Edwards is a naga.
(Early is also a vampire, Melody and Noelle are witches or some shit, and I think Sharp is doing the whole vampire detective helping-the-helpless thing, because that is how she fucking rolls okay man OKAY) (I have no idea about anyone else okay I just have a lot of feelings)
Here, it’s Max’s birthday, let me ramble about this AU and, to some extent, Max himself.
RAMBLING IS WHAT I DO BEST, YOU KNOW.
Anyway, this AU: Vamps are pretty vampy. Their eyes are sort of a reddish black normally, but they do shark out from bloodlust. Or blood/lust. Sex and blood are very tied up together for vamps in this universe. Which, well, okay, that’s pretty typical. Anyway, Max isn’t all that into it.
Here’s where the rambling about Max in general comes into play! Max is ace. Or demi, really. He generally tends to self-identify as such when that’s a thing in his universe. He’s not usually that into sex.
BACK TO THIS AU: apparently being vamped has some sort of supernatural effect on your sex drive! Many/most vampires are almost hypersexual, which sort of makes sense, as it’s the way the tend to attract their prey (ie, humans) because they are, well, attractive.
Max had pretty much just figured out all his sexuality stuff when his dad turned him. I’m just going to skate over how fucked up that is (since sex and blood are so intertwined for vamps in this story, it is kind of totally fucked up) and was basically magically pushed into a place where he abruptly has a higher desire for sex and everyone fucking finds him attractive and he is not particularly happy about it.
As an aside: Max’s father is kind of not a great person. He is especially not a great father. Their relationship often veers towards abusive. You may imagine how this applies to this universe.
Max has the unhappiest monster!verse story so far. SORRY MAX. I WOULD NOT TORTURE YOU IF I DID NOT LOVE YOU.
Let’s kick this off with a snippet I’ve been sitting on for a while, shall we?
Friday the 13th
Edwards got into a fist fight on Friday the 13th. Nothing bad happened to him, but Max wound up with a bloody nose and a great deal of bruises. Edwards went on with his life without giving it a thought.
Max, on the other hand, stewed about it all day.
I suppose I could reblog this.
Max’s birthday does, in fact, fall on Friday every four years.
It is MAX’S BIRTHDAY today. I mean, it would be, were he real. Which he is not.
WHATEVER I have been celebrating my characters’ birthdays for ages. WHAT TO DO.
And here’s a chronologically logical bit to follow that up with. This is rare and strange.
This is also where, as a longer bit, it starts getting messier and would need some serious editing to be…good. OH WELL this is a silly thing anyway.
-—-
“You’re off-tempo at the start of Act 2,” Max muttered.
“You’re full of shit,” Edwards replied, taking a drag on his cigarette.
“And smoking is bad for your voice,” Max said. “It’d be a shame to ruin the only decent part of you. Light?”
“Hypocrite,” Edwards said, holding out his lighter. Max leaned in and held his cigarette to the flame. “You seemed to think other parts of me were decent earlier.”
“Enjoyable isn’t the same as decent,” Max said. “And I’m not a singer. I don’t care if I ruin my voice.”
“Hmph.”
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More self-indulgent author appeal tidbits! It’s what I do, taking my what-ifs too seriously. Sometimes it yields results.
Anyway, this would probably end in violent porn if I could finish it, but I wrote it during SDCC last year and understandably got distracted by con crud and new books.
(For reference, monster choice here is not wholly self-indulgent; if I ever did some sort of weird fantasy monster AU, Max would be a vampire, Kev would be an incubus, and I think Edwards would be a naga. Zach would be a troll, and so would his sisters probably and oh my god I just thought about Sonja as a troll omg ahahahaha)
——
Edwards gets off the couch when he hears the knock on his front door. He assumes it will be Kev, out early or with a canceled engagement, and without the decency to call or text first. He is wrong.
It’s Max, leaning hard on the doorjamb, staring down at the concrete. His hair is in his eyes, but it isn’t enough to hide how much paler than usual he is—ashen and sickly, not like his usual simple light skin—nor is it enough to hide his scuffed sweater and torn collar, which is turned up, hiding the lower parts of his face.
“You alright?” Edwards asks. He can’t imagine why Max would come to him if he was having any sort of problem, but he obviously isn’t well.
“No,” Max says. He looks up. There are dark circles under his eyes. ”Can I come in?”
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